I can't, and wouldn't anyway, speak for the rest of the male population. But here's my personal input on what I deem to be a fairly serious issue. And this issue is the fact that it appears that most women, or atleast girls, have a huge misconception about guys. Again, I can't speak for most guys, and these misconceptions obviously have enough root in them so that they're repeated. But seriously.
Why is it okay to assume that all guys are sex sex sex penis sex. I mean, really. I know guys act like it sometimes, but girls can act like it too. But it's amplified for guys. Sure, hormones can make guys horny, but what the hell, girls get horny too. And then it's every guy is the same. Every guy would cheat on his wife if he wasn't going to be caught, and every guy would have sex with any pretty girl. And guys don't have girls as friends just to be friends with them, they want sex. I have one thing to say to that.
Bull. Shit. That is so ridiculous, that really, it angers me. I have girl friends, and you know what? They're friends. Imagine. Really. It's that easy. Hey, they're all cute too. But I LIKE them as friends. I wouldn't change that. I know when someone will be a friend or if there's a chance to be something more almost immediately, and if it's the former, it's like, bam, kay, we're good. I'm lucky to have this skill, but to some degree everyone has this. And even those who don't, they don't want to have sex with everything that moves. God, even if it WAS all about sex, there's so many different things to say about it. Maybe they're thinking about sex like intimacy. Maybe THEY think they need to have sex because if they don't, they're gay, or a pussy. And it sure isn't just the guys who'll tell him that.
As was brought up to me today, America is a culture of extremes. It's SEX SEX SEX, or you're a nun, or frigid. The ironic thing is, neither of those extremes is comfortable with sex, in my opinion. You can brag about it, but you're not talking about it. And they're two different things. Why so uncomfortable with sex? Possibly because we're uncomfortable with intimacy, and guess what the most intimate act is? Bingo. Girls aren't the only ones uncomfortable about sex, the only ones who think about it more than "I want to do it." Some of us care more about love then sex.
And for the guys, if this is your mindset, grow up. You're not 9 years old, and giggling at the word penis anymore. It is, possibly, THE most annoying thing to me. The whole shallow thing.
My point, if there is one, is this. There is no guy to show you that we're not all the same. Because there's not one exclusion to the rule. There's many many many more.
And if there isn't, and it's just me and a handful of others, well fuck. I still stand by my statements for myself.
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6 comments:
Rather vehemently stated ideas, but I agree. There does seem to be an incredibly poorly grounded stereotype of the teenage male, but that's not to say there aren't any of the teenage female either, albeit they are entirely different. The idea of a culture of extremes that skirts the issue of sex is also interesting because clearly, without sex, what's going to happen to the culture? This taboo might be like the bathroom one? Natural things we don't like to mention but recognize as essential? You present some good ideas, I'll side with you on proving the idea wrong though.
Yeah, I didn't write this as a so much as an arguement against it, where then, I would've tried to be more eloquent. But more as a rant, which, ironically, can sometimes be more effective then an eloquent speach.
I was angry when I wrote it, because it really bothers me. It's not only unfair to me, but I think it's unfair for everyone. It blocks men and women from understanding eachother.
I agree with you. I want to get that straight immediately because there is a ridiculous stereotype against young males and their sex drives. But I must address the fact that our society puts a whole lot of responsibility in the hands of the female when it comes to sex - as does nature of course. So girls are assumed to be more careful, even though thats often untrue. Example - the article Sal gave us about Spring Break being dangerous for women because they have unprotected sex or sex with many partners. Well, if the women are having unprotected sex, then so are the men they're doing it with! So where's the article about that?
I'm not sure where I'm going with this so I'm just gonna stop. I need more sleep.
Sorry Liesl, didn't find that article. But that reflects the way our society works: our culture creates expectations of guys acting like that and so there are expectations that women be the responsible one. I do think that pregnancy more adversely affects the female's life than the males so maybe there is a bit of justification for the concern for females, but also the article was about the effects of alcohol which affects females more quickly than men. I think that rants can be effective, though I think your use of profanity takes away from your thoughtful writing (even when it's in the form of a rant).
I know Sal, I do try to avoid profanity as much as possible, and what I think I shall try to do from now on is write it as I feel, but edit it later.
I try to distance myself from profanity, but it's kind of ingrained in me to use it when angry. Maybe for another blog. =)
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